By Samantha Lowe, Youth Services Coordinator
Last year, I wrote a piece for First 2 Know about my experience with mental health and attending Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). I wanted people to know it’s okay to ask for help and that they’re not alone.
This year, I’d like to talk about the healing process.
I think there’s often a desire, maybe even a longing, for healing to be a clear, linear journey, with defined phases we can predict and plan for. Unfortunately, that’s simply not the case. No healing process, whether physical, mental, or related to grief or trauma, is linear.
Think of a skein of yarn. You want to pull the end smoothly and easily so you can get to work. But how often does that actually happen? You pull a few inches, and then it stops. You tug a little harder and (pop!) out comes a huge tangle. No knitting yet. You have to work through that knot before you can move forward.
You don’t throw the yarn away. You detangle it, because you’re excited to make something beautiful.
Mental health needs to be more like that. We need to pause, work through the tangles, and keep going. Otherwise, we end up knitting the knots right into the fabric, and that makes everything more difficult in the long run.
Everyone’s healing journey looks different. For me, I’m nowhere near “healed,” and that’s okay. Honestly, I’m not sure any of us ever fully are.
The truth is, I’m back in DBT. It’s common to need a second round, and despite my stubborn willfulness, I had to admit that while I could recite the skills I learned, I wasn’t actually using them.
Maybe life is just one long scarf we’re knitting; working through the knots as we go.
If you’re curious about others’ journeys or looking for mental health resources, as always, the Library is here. See below for memoirs and other materials that explore these experiences:
Calming the emotional storm : using dialectical behavior therapy skills to manage your emotions & balance your life by: Van Dijk, Sheri
My Lovely Wife in the Psych Ward: A Memoir by: Lukach, Mark
Another Kind of Madness: a Journey Through the Stigma and Hope of Mental Illness by: Hinshaw, Stephen P
Sometimes I Act Crazy : Living with Borderline Personality Disorder by: Kreisman, Jerold J. (Jerold Jay)
The Way She Feels : My Life on the Borderline in Pictures and Pieces by: Cook, Courtney
Notes on a Banana : a Memoir of Food, Love, and Manic Depression by: Leite, David
Easy Crafts for the Insane: A Mostly Funny Memoir of Mental Illness and Making Things by: Brown, Kelly Williams
Cudi : The Memoir by: Kid Cudi